Thursday, May 13, 2010

To answer a burning question...



Its not all that fun really, when a cat brings you for a walk. He wants you to allow him to walk all by himself but you know _that_would be foolhardy, not to mention reckless. However in your head, you would probably be thinking ...if only I can do that. Life would be so much simpler with kitty. But you _know_ you would never ever do that to your kitty because it would break your heart if something happens to him then.

So you find an appropriate dress (not too fancy but it should still how off your kitty well), give him firm advice and a set of consequences that he would have to suffer from if he breaks any of the rules. Your cat would listen patiently, nod his head and ever so softly tell you that he would love you more if you would just hurry up and get going for the walk.

You settle him in _his_ own carrier, bring the kibble (in case he gets hungry), the gloves (in case you have to remove dangerous objects like razor blades from the grass as they would hurt his paws), plastic bags (in case he decides to hack up the grass that he has just eaten), a book (to read (in case he decides to stand or sit and stare at nothing and you would not appear foolish in the eyes of dog lovers and humans in general), a camera (in case he does something too cute), an energy bar (in case you feel faint from standing so long under the sun as your cat might decide to meditate and contemplate the meaning of the universe) an finally your cell phone (as you might need to call for an ambulance just in case you feel a heatstroke coming on and your cat may not have the time nor the inclination to call for help).

Once all this is settled, you wheel him in his carrier (on top of a stroller that you have bought online) and bring him to the very small plot of grass that pretends to be a park. You menacle the stroller to the rails (in case strange women decide to make away with the stroller that had bought online for your cat). You invite your cat to step out of the carrier and then prepare for the V_E_R_Y long 45-minute meander.

You may have to suffer stares from the much saner people who have dogs that they walk instead of cats that walk you :)

Finally, you bring your cat upstairs, attempt to clean him up (watch those sharp claws that even the vets are scared of) and watch him stroll up to his favorite rug and his nap.

And suddenly you feel a strange sense of well-being and satisfaction that indeed your cat seems happier now than before. You realise too late that your cat has trained you very well but no matter. The sight of your cat peacefully sleeping is reward enough.

So to everyone who has asked me if it is possible to walk a cat - It would probably be the case of your cat walking you :) and _that_we know is entirely possible.

3 comments:

  1. Anonymous3:21 PM

    You just describe motherhood to a T though i think it is easier with children ;)

    ReplyDelete
  2. Great video! And who cares what others think as long as you're having a good time, right?!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Hahaha. Very well written. Too bad my gang will never like to take a walk outside.

    ReplyDelete